Set my eyes on You, Lord!

Do you ever have those moments when the reality of who Christ is and what He's done for you hits? Well... I just had one. It's always one of the most humbling yet encouraging moments ever. Then you realize that there's no way we can even conceive how truly incredible Christ is and you're even more humbled! I don't know why or how the Lord picks the times that He impresses my heart with these moments of understanding, but they always seem to be at the most unexpected but most needed times.

I can't say that the past few weeks have been very great, and I've really been wrestling with why the Lord brought me out here. I know He has so much to teach me (and there's so many invaluable lessons I've already learned), but it's just hard when you have NO IDEA what He's leading you to do. I know I'm supposed to bring Him glory in whatever I do, so right now thats my aim. There are many times I miss the mark, but He's so merciful to pick me back up and give me another chance.

Anyway, I've just had a lot on my mind lately, and I've realized a lot of areas in my life that I need to surrender to Him. While I've taken a leap of faith by moving out here, I still often rely on myself and my own strength to accomplish things instead of allowing Christ to fully take over. This desire to make a plan for myself and accomplish that plan my way have made the past couple months very selfish. I realize moving to a new place and trying to get your feet on the ground requires some amount of self preservation, but I have been WAY too focused on me, what I want out of this experience, and how I'm going to go about getting it. That is not the way I want or need to live. My focus should be completely on Christ! He is the only one worthy of my attention. Everything else will fall into place if I just keep my heart focused on Him! Now, this is easy to write down right here, but I pray that He makes it true of my mind and heart. I will not survive out here unless that is my sole desire... to follow and glorify Him.

Fending for myself and depending on my own resources over the past two months has led to frustrations with job stuff, confusion about what I'm supposed to be doing out here, and worries about finances. Christ has every single one of these things under control, and He knows exactly what the future holds for me! With money running out, confusion about my future at an all time high, and job opportunities seemingly nowhere in sight, I've been brought to a place where I have nothing left but Him. Now it's time to see if thats enough... and I have no doubt it is.

My friend Dwight told me to keep the verse below hidden in my heart, and I'm so glad he did. The Word is so alive.

"And this I call to mind, and therefore I have hope: The steadfast love of the LORD never ceases. His mercies never come to an end. They are new every morning. Great is Your faithfulness! 'The LORD is my portion,' says my soul, 'therefore I will hope in Him. The LORD is good to those who wait for Him. To the soul who seeks Him.'" Lamentations 3:21-25

I know Christ brought me out here, and I know He knows why. I ask you to pray that He'll continue to help me to trust in that fact and follow His leading. We serve a God more powerful than we can imagine, so I rest in that assurance.

Thank you again for loving me and loving Christ. I am so blessed.
Robby